Networking Code of Conduct
“Your network is your net worth.” In no circumstance is this truer than running your own independent consultancy.
But this reduces the people you know to a weird transactional equation, which is gross. I don’t like that. And yet, I do recognize the value of my relationships. 90% of my revenue last year came from my immediate network.
That’s why I like to think about my network more like a garden. The more thoughtfully I tend to it, the more it yields in terms of both intangible benefits (beauty) and tangible benefits (fresh flowers and produce).
Being a full-time employee is like having access to a cut-your-own flower patch or pick-your-own berry garden. Other people (hiring managers, recruiters) tend the soil so that you can graze from the top.
When you’re solo, you’re responsible for everything. As I’ve grown my business, the ways I leverage my network and networking tools (LinkedIn) have necessarily changed.
This blog post outlines my personal approach to networking. It’s for anyone wanting to be more intentional about their approach to growing and tending to their network. It may also be helpful if you’re thinking of contacting me.
Hat tip to Patrick McKenzie for Standing Invitation, which inspired this post.
My connection boundaries
The utility of LinkedIn, to me, is building connections. I also use it as a marketing channel and a place to learn more about businesses (how they’re structured and their challenges).
For this reason, I only accept LinkedIn connections from people I’d be comfortable asking for an introduction or work. This is typically—but not exclusively—people I know or people whose work I admire.
If you enjoy my work but don’t fall into these categories (thank you!), please consider Following me.
If you’re trying to sell me something, please don’t.
Introductions
If you and I have worked together and I’m an enthusiastic supporter of your work, I’m always happy to connect you with people in my network (assuming they’re interested).
All of my introductions are “double opt-in,” meaning I’ll always check in with the person I’m connecting you with before reaching out. If they’re not interested in connecting, I’ll let you know. If they are interested in connecting, I’ll send the invite.
If you and I have worked together but not directly, or if we’ve just met at a networking event, I’m happy to forward your information to people in my network as more of an FYI. If they’re interested in reaching out, I can connect you two. It’s lower-commitment outreach.
Virtual coffees
Generosity is a core value of mine. I’m constantly awed by people willing to share their expertise and support with me.
I’ll do free, virtual coffees with anyone in my extended network (ex. people who worked at the same company or went to the same school) and people in their extended network (ex. the cousin of a former colleague trying to get into digital marketing). These conversations typically center on sharing my experience breaking into product marketing and independent consulting.
How to be a better connector
Understand the weight of your ask
Asking me to pass your resume along to a former co-worker is a light-weight ask. It’s fast and low-risk with a high potential upside if my former co-worker is hiring. Asking me to connect you with the CMO at one of my client companies is a heavy-weight ask. It will take social maneuvering from me (ie. time — it will take my time) and it’s high-risk to my reputation if you waste the CMOs time. And high-risk to my business revenue if this reflects poorly enough on me.
Before you make an ask, gut-check whether it’s light-weight or heavy-weight. You can feel comfortable making a light-weight ask of just about anyone, but your heavy-weight asks should be more buttoned up. More tips on that are below.
Give people an out
When you’re making heavy-weight asks, it’s helpful to provide a lighter-weight option that gives the person you’re asking for help an easier way to support you.
Respond generously to any perceived squirminess. The outcome of your outreach may be positive, but pressuring someone into exploiting their network erodes trust and likeability with the person you’re asking to help you.
Be strategic
When it comes to reaping the more tangible benefits of your network, a single strategic connection can be more valuable than 100 randos. You also avoid burning out your network.
Make it easy to help you
Come with a specific ask. Know what you want. Send me your questions ahead of time. "Show me you know me."
I’ve saved the two most important tips for last...
Follow up
If we didn’t vibe, you shouldn’t feel like you need to send me a thank you note or ever speak with me again. But if I shared advice with you that made your life easier, tell me. This is the value to me even if you never throw me work or have me on your podcast.
Reciprocate
Life is long, and sometimes dynamics shift to the extent that you have something of value to other people. Always look for lightweight opportunities to boost people who help you: repost their work, shout them out on social networks, have them on your podcast, and connect them with your network. People who understand follow-up and reciprocity go so far in this world it’s insane.